The Oldest Disciple: Farming Intimacy to Become Immortal

The Oldest Disciple: Farming Intimacy to Become Immortal

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Synopsis

At 78 years old, with one foot in the grave and zero achievements, Li Meng awakens a System that turns intimacy into immortality.

He has no time for meditation. He has no talent for swordsmanship. But in the infamous Joyous Union Sect, he has the perfect cheat code.

[Ding! System Activated.] [Core Mechanic: Convert physical contact with female cultivators into EXP.]

Holding Hands: +10 EXP.

A Passionate Kiss: +100 EXP.

Dual Cultivation (Going all the way): LEVEL UP!

Realizing his advantage, Li Meng discards his dignity to survive. He adopts the persona of a harmless, benevolent “Grandpa” figure to lower the guards of the sect’s beautiful yet dangerous women.

To the outside world, he is the kind-hearted “Wealth-Scattering Senior Brother.” In reality, he is a cunning old fox hunting for his next source of cultivation.

From the arrogant Senior Aunt to the innocent Junior Sister, Li Meng will help them solve their problems… in exchange for a night of “cultivation.”
Why read this?

Unique MC: An experienced, manipulative old man, not a naive teenager.

System Progression: Clear stats, alchemy mastery, and talisman crafting.

Harem Building: Gotta catch ’em all!

Weak to Strong: Defying death to stand at the apex.

Chapter 31 The Mist Demon

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Unfortunately, the system provided no information whatsoever. Li Meng cursed the system internally for being utterly useless.

“What if it really is a ten-thousand-year Mystic Yin Fruit?” Standing by the lakeshore, Li Meng wore an expression of deep conflict.

An inadvertent glance made his eyes light up. Not far along the shore was a patch of blue spiritual grass, about half a person’s height. The grass emitted a faint, shimmering halo of Spiritual Power.

“Mystic Yin Grass?” Li Meng’s face showed disbelief. He hurriedly ran toward that patch of Mystic Yin Grass. “I’m rich, I’m rich…”

Squatting on the ground, Li Meng excitedly harvested the Mystic Yin Grass. There were at least a hundred plants in this patch, and their age was certainly no less than two thousand years.

“Could it really be a Mystic Yin Fruit?” If there was Mystic Yin Grass here on the shore, away from the island in the lake’s center, perhaps that icy tree at the heart of the lake truly was a Mystic Yin Tree.

“Forget it, I’ll harvest all this Mystic Yin Grass first!” Li Meng sped up his harvesting pace. While no one was around, getting the grass into his storage pouch was the top priority. If people showed up later, a fight would be unavoidable. With this much Mystic Yin Grass, even fellow sect members would likely fight over it.

“Thousand-year Mystic Yin Grass?”

Speak of the devil. A voice full of pleasant surprise rang out from the forest. Three Outer Disciples from Giant Sword Mountain emerged from the trees one after another. All three stared with burning greed at Li Meng, who was squatting and harvesting the grass.

“Old man, hand over the Mystic Yin Grass and we might spare your life!” The leading male cultivator pointed his giant sword at Li Meng.

Li Meng ignored the trio entirely. His hands moved even more deftly as he continued harvesting.

“Hmph! Old fool, you’re asking for death!” Seeing Li Meng disregard him, the lead male cultivator snorted coldly. Gripping his giant sword, he soared through the air toward Li Meng.

The Giant Sword Mountain Outer Disciple closed in on Li Meng, swinging his sword down in a cleaving strike aimed to split him in two. Just as the giant sword was about to connect, Li Meng stored away the final stalk of Mystic Yin Grass into his pouch.

A talisman suddenly appeared in his hand. In the next instant, Li Meng vanished into thin air. The giant sword, having lost its target, slammed heavily into the ground with a thunderous “BOOM!”, carving out a large crater.

“An Earth Shrinking Talisman?” “Find him quickly! He must be nearby!” “Don’t bother looking, Senior Brother! Look over there!”

The female disciple among the three pointed excitedly toward the island in the lake. The three on the shore all turned to look. Their faces immediately lit up with wild joy.

“Could that be… a ten-thousand-year Mystic Yin Fruit?” “It’s so large. It must be a ten-thousand-year fruit.” “Excellent! Senior Brother, Junior Sister, I’ll go scout ahead!”

One of the male cultivators shot into the air, flying toward the central island. He skimmed over the lake’s surface, drawing closer to his target. As the island grew nearer, an excited smile spread across his face. Remembering the old man who had fled earlier, a flicker of scorn passed through his eyes. What an idiot, choosing to harvest mere grass instead of going for the fruit. A single Mystic Yin Fruit was worth a hundred stalks of thousand-year Mystic Yin Grass.

“Junior Brother! Be careful!” His Senior Brother’s alarmed shout came from behind.

The flying disciple sneered inwardly. Nice try, Senior Brother. I won’t fall for that.

At that same moment, the mist over the lake began to churn violently. A massive hand formed from condensed mist surged upward and grabbed the male cultivator mid-flight. It clenched around him and dragged him down into the thick fog below. From start to finish, not a single scream was heard.

The two remaining disciples on shore watched with faces pale from lingering fear. They had almost given in to temptation and followed. Thankfully, their Junior Brother had used his life to scout the path.

“Senior Brother… what… what was that?” the female disciple asked. She was quite attractive—not stunningly beautiful, but with an excellent figure: curvaceous and full-figured. She edged closer to her Senior Brother.

“I… I don’t know!” The male cultivator’s expression was grim. A treasure was right before their eyes, yet some mysterious entity in the lake barred their way.

Hidden in the forest using a Stealth Talisman, Li Meng had also witnessed the attack by the misty hand. “Could it be a Mist Demon?” Mist Demons were mysterious creatures native to Ghost Mist Forest. It was said that the pervasive fog shrouding this forest was connected to them. They possessed abilities to bewilder minds and create illusions.

“The Mystic Yin Grass… it isn’t an illusion, is it?” Li Meng quickly extended his Divine Sense into his storage pouch. The harvested grass was still there. “Good… good…” He sighed in relief.

He then recalled the earlier Spiritual Power tide phenomenon. Could that surge have been triggered by this patch of Mystic Yin Grass? Yes, that must be it. Otherwise, the intensity wouldn’t have been so weak.

“It’s actually a Mystic Yin Fruit! Haha!” More people arrived. Five Outer Disciples from Thousand Crane Valley arrived on flying swords, descending and landing on another part of the shore.

“No wonder there was a Spiritual Power tide! It’s a ten-thousand-year Mystic Yin Fruit!” A hearty voice boomed from within the forest as four Qingxu Sect disciples emerged.

“Amitabha! To think such an opportunity exists within this Scarlet Forbidden Ground!” Six monks from Jinshan Temple walked out from another section of forest lining a different part of the lakeshore.

Looking around at the sky above Ice Lake, cultivators from all five major sects continued to arrive on flying swords one after another. The earlier Spiritual Power tide had drawn every nearby cultivator like moths to a flame. In no time at all, several dozen Outer Disciples from all five sects had gathered along various points of the lakeshore.

The Mystic Yin Fruit sat upon its island in plain sight. Yet not a single cultivator on shore dared make a move. Everyone waited—waited for some reckless fool who couldn’t hold back any longer.

“Huh? Why is Xuan Hao here too?” As he watched, Li Meng spotted an acquaintance. Xuan Hao arrived on his sword and landed gracefully among a group of Joyous Union Sect Outer Disciples.

The Outer Disciples from all five sects formed opposing groups around different sections of shore, locked in a tense standoff. No one dared strike first.

“It’s good Junior Sister Yuan didn’t come; otherwise it’d be hard to get both away safely.” But as if summoned by his thoughts…

“Senior Brother Xuan!”

Another graceful figure descended from above on her flying sword. Her lovely form flew down and threw herself into Xuan Hao’s arms. Yuan Baobao’s face was flushed pink with happiness at finding her Senior Brother again.

Li Meng, hiding behind a large tree, felt sweat bead on his brow. Damn it! Why did Junior Sister Yuan have to come too?

If whatever lurked in that lake truly was a Mist Demon, then every single cultivator here was nothing more than bait waiting to be devoured. Li Meng had already concluded that Ice Lake was one giant trap. The reason why this Mist Demon hadn’t attacked yet was because it was waiting for more prey to be lured in, so it could catch them all in one fell swoop. Silently, Li Meng began edging closer toward where the Joyous Union Sect disciples were gathered.

“Senior Brother, I have a bad feeling about this. I… I think we should leave,” Yuan Baobao whispered softly against Xuan Hao’s chest. She knew better than to let other sectmates hear such words; someone would surely pick fault, saying she undermined morale. At times like these, banding together for warmth seemed like their only option.

Xuan Hao lowered his head close to her ear. “Don’t worry. We still have those Earth Shrinking Talismans Senior Brother Li gave us.”

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