The Oldest Disciple: Farming Intimacy to Become Immortal

The Oldest Disciple: Farming Intimacy to Become Immortal

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Synopsis

At 78 years old, with one foot in the grave and zero achievements, Li Meng awakens a System that turns intimacy into immortality.

He has no time for meditation. He has no talent for swordsmanship. But in the infamous Joyous Union Sect, he has the perfect cheat code.

[Ding! System Activated.] [Core Mechanic: Convert physical contact with female cultivators into EXP.]

Holding Hands: +10 EXP.

A Passionate Kiss: +100 EXP.

Dual Cultivation (Going all the way): LEVEL UP!

Realizing his advantage, Li Meng discards his dignity to survive. He adopts the persona of a harmless, benevolent “Grandpa” figure to lower the guards of the sect’s beautiful yet dangerous women.

To the outside world, he is the kind-hearted “Wealth-Scattering Senior Brother.” In reality, he is a cunning old fox hunting for his next source of cultivation.

From the arrogant Senior Aunt to the innocent Junior Sister, Li Meng will help them solve their problems… in exchange for a night of “cultivation.”
Why read this?

Unique MC: An experienced, manipulative old man, not a naive teenager.

System Progression: Clear stats, alchemy mastery, and talisman crafting.

Harem Building: Gotta catch ’em all!

Weak to Strong: Defying death to stand at the apex.

Chapter 50 Go Find Senior Qu

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Several days later.

Joyous Union Sect. Outer Sect, Little Bamboo Peak.

“Senior Brother! Is Senior Brother here?”

In the afternoon, while Li Meng was refining pills in the alchemy room, a man’s shout suddenly erupted from outside.

“Who is it? Can’t they see the ‘Do Not Disturb’ sign?”

Inside the alchemy room, Li Meng sat cross-legged on a meditation cushion and opened his eyes with a sigh of resignation. If an ordinary alchemist were disturbed at such a critical moment, the entire batch of pills would be ruined. Not long after, a soft click sounded as the main door of the house opened from within. Li Meng, dressed in his blue robe, stepped out.

“Come in, the gate isn’t locked!”

Beyond the courtyard fence, Li Meng saw a figure also clad in blue robes—a male Outer Disciple at the Qi Condensation stage. The disciple pushed the gate open and hurried into the courtyard. Upon seeing Li Meng, his eyes lit up, and he stepped forward with a respectful bow.

“Senior Brother Li!”

Li Meng returned the bow. “Junior Brother, you’ve come in such haste. Is there something urgent?”

Though he asked, Li Meng didn’t truly believe anything urgent could involve him. He had always kept a low profile, neither stirring up trouble nor taking on heavy responsibilities. Until now, trouble had never managed to cling to him.

The disciple looked at Li Meng with a grave expression. “Senior Brother Li, have you offended Senior Su Can?”

Senior Su Can?

Li Meng’s face showed instant understanding. So it was that fellow causing trouble. Li Meng chuckled softly, stroking his beard. “Does Junior Brother know something?”

The disciple nodded. “Senior Su sought out Senior Brother Zhao Hu. He asked him to find a way to… cripple you. Senior Brother Zhao instructed me to warn you and to ask what this is all about. He also said he has stalled the matter for now and hopes you can relocate somewhere else to avoid Senior Su for a while.”

Within the sect, crippling someone was both difficult and surprisingly simple. Su Can was an Inner Sect Foundation Establishment disciple. If he personally attacked an Outer Disciple and no one cared, it might pass. But if someone with an agenda caught him red-handed, even as the descendant of a Golden Core Elder, the Enforcement Hall would have his hide.

It was much easier if an Outer Disciple handled the task. They could find a pretext for a challenge on the Martial Arena. If one’s hand was “a bit too heavy” and someone ended up crippled, the punishment would be a mere slap on the wrist.

Li Meng waved his hand. Five jade vials of pills flew from his storage bag and hovered before the disciple.

“Here are some pills for solidifying one’s foundation. Junior Brother, keep one vial for yourself. Deliver the rest to Junior Brother Zhao on my behalf as a token of my gratitude. Tell him I am aware of the situation and that I will relocate from Little Bamboo Peak within a month.”

The disciple’s face brightened with delight. He stored the pills and bowed respectfully. “Yes, Senior Brother. I will definitely relay your message.”

Li Meng chuckled and nodded. “Take care on your way, Junior Brother. I won’t see you out.”

The disciple turned and left, closing the fence gate behind him before soaring away on his flying sword. Li Meng narrowed his eyes, watching the receding figure.

After sixty years of quiet cultivation, trouble had finally come knocking. To think someone would plot to cripple his cultivation over a mere disagreement, all because he had gotten a bit too “close” to Senior Qu. He truly wondered how such an arrogant and domineering person as Su Can had survived this long. Was Grandmaster Su Zhe really so formidable?

“It seems I’ll have to rely on ‘soft rice’ for a while,” Li Meng chuckled to himself, turning back into the alchemy room. “My cultivation can’t fall behind either.”

There was no need to rush the refining. There was still time before the auction, and he only needed enough stock to make a profit.

“I’ll go find Senior Qu tonight.” A faint smile touched Li Meng’s lips. The feeling of holding Senior Qu while he slept was far too comfortable; he was growing quite fond of the sensation.

Li Meng formed a hand seal. With a whoosh, flames roared to life within the furnace.

Time flowed by until the sun sank in the west. As the last rays vanished below the horizon, the door to the house opened once more. Li Meng stepped out, and his aged body soared into the air, speeding toward the Inner Sect.

Though Five Spirit Roots were called Waste Spirit Roots and cultivation was agonizingly slow, the sheer volume of Mana they provided far surpassed that of other cultivators at the same level.

Joyous Union Sect. Inner Sect, Cloud Peak.

“Your nephew Li Meng pays his respects to Senior Qu!”

Hovering on his sword, Li Meng bowed toward the mist-shrouded peak. Today, Cloud Peak was unusually quiet. The Foundation Establishment seniors who usually loitered for amusement were gone. Only a few strands of Divine Sense swept over him briefly before the mist parted, revealing a path into the mountain’s heart.

Li Meng guided his sword to a pavilion at the summit and landed lightly. He bowed toward the structure. “Senior Qu, I hope I am not disturbing you.”

“Since you’re already here, stop with the pretentious courtesy.” Her cool voice drifted from within.

Li Meng’s smile widened. He ambled toward the door, pushed it open, and ascended the inner staircase to the second floor. He didn’t pause at the curtain partition, simply lifting it and walking through. On a meditation platform sat a graceful figure in purple silk. From any angle, her slender form was exquisitely beautiful.

“What is it?” Qu Rou opened her eyes, gazing at her approaching Junior Nephew.

Li Meng chuckled and sat beside her on the platform. “Senior Qu… I simply missed you.”

Qu Rou looked coldly at him. “Your time is running short. Why not focus on cultivation? There might still be a chance for Foundation Establishment.”

Li Meng reached out and took her smooth, delicate hand. She shot him a frosty glare for his audacity, but she did not pull away.

Li Meng chuckled again. “If I chased after that slim chance only to lose this time with you… and I still failed in the end… your nephew would truly die with regrets.”

A flicker of helplessness passed through Qu Rou’s eyes. He was clearly exhausted, yet he never seemed to tire of this…

“Senior Qu… may your nephew stay tonight?” Li Meng looked at her with ardent warmth.

Qu Rou withdrew her hand. With a wave of her sleeve, the windows behind the curtain snapped shut simultaneously. Li Meng’s eyes gleamed as he grinned.

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